Valentine’s Day is coming soon. Do you love … yourself?
Let’s get philosophical. Do you think you are your body, or is your body just the physical side of yourself? I don’t think it matters, actually. Whatever you believe, you need your body, and your body needs you. It’s the only one you have.
Do you look in the mirror and condemn yourself for getting older? Do you hate the physical gifts your genes have given you? I hope not, because a poor body image can lead to depression and eating disorders. How can we come to simply enjoy the body we have? It’s called having “body positivity.” We can find ways to change our habits of thinking and our behaviour that will let us like the way we look, even if Vogue rejects both our before and after pictures. We can still love ourselves if we’re a work-in-progress. Self-love can motivate us to show our love by taking better care of ourselves.
Sadly, we have to face a culture of cliches and attitudes called body-shaming, the act of ridiculing a person's physical appearance. Like name-calling, it’s rude and hurtful. There are reasons why people body-shame others. Some do it to hurt. We don’t know too many people like that, I hope, and I hope we don’t depend on them for our self-image. Some good-hearted people, well-meaning friends, do it to help, but don’t realize that it hurts. I like what J.K. Rowling said. “Is fat really the worst thing a human being can be? Is fat worse than vindictive, jealous, shallow, vain, boring, or cruel? Not to me.”
At the risk of boring you, I can’t repeat too often that we need to eat healthy meals to fuel our mind and body, exercise appropriately because it helps us get stronger and feel energized, and to see the doctor when feeling sick. However, at TOPS we also discuss other factors that contribute to weight gain. Some of these are the genetic component, heavily processed foods, food addiction, aggressive marketing, pharmaceutical drugs, the effects of Leptin, poverty, accessibility of healthy food, added sugar, and misinformation. It’s complicated. Obesity is not solely caused by contrariness or lack of willpower.
The focus at TOPS is sharing healthy strategies to replace bad habits. We take the body-positive approach that it’s more important to be healthy and happy than to care about what other people think. Taking the mental spotlight off how our body looks and basing our self-perceptions on our talents or our relationships can be a positive step. As well, we can look for things that make us feel good about our appearance. I’m sure we each have several. And when we start to appreciate our body, we will want to take good care of it. We’ll start doing all the things we know are good for us, because we love our body, rather than hate it.
Join us at TOPS, where you’ll meet a non-judgmental and generous group of people. We’d love to see you at our meetings, to share some of our strategies with you. We meet every Wednesday morning at the Community Centre, from 9:00 to 10:00. We follow all the Covid protocols. We’re a low-cost, enjoyable, international self-help program that welcomes everyone. (Your first visit is free.) Have a Happy Valentine’s Day.
Submitted by Amber Harvey